


of monsters and m&ms

by Noa



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Comedy, Cute, Gen, Halloween, M/M, Scary Movies, Stridercest - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-25
Updated: 2014-10-25
Packaged: 2018-02-22 14:41:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2511380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noa/pseuds/Noa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They weren’t 12 anymore, they could handle a few scary movies.</p>
            </blockquote>





	of monsters and m&ms

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Halloween. A bit early, but I figured we could use some happiness in these trying times.

October 31st, and Dave Strider was ready to party. With about twenty more minutes on the clock till Dirk got there, Dave decided to inspect his set-up one more time.

On the coffee table was a stack of the goriest obscure horror films he could find, as well as a few classics in the genre. It was a decent amount of movies, and Dirk said he’d bring a few Asian horrors too, so they should be set. Next to the DVDs was a pile of snacks, carefully selected for their spooky factor (Dave had just grabbed anything with a pumpkin on it). He also got Doritos, because a movie night without Doritos was more terrifying than all those films combined. Even a Strider had his limits.

“Got everything you need?” Bro said as he walked up into the living room. He glanced over to the coffee table, and let out a low whistle at the collection of movies. That was some pretty heavy shit.

“Yeah.” Dave replied. Bro had announced beforehand he wouldn’t be home this Halloween’s eve (which may or may not have prompted Dave to invite Dirk over), but he hadn’t mentioned what time he’d leave. With Dirk about to arrive and Bro still there, Dave was very eager to have the house to himself. He crossed his arms, and tried staring Bro down. “You can go now.”

“Actually, I was thinkin’ I might join you kids. Offer some adult shoulders to hide behind when y’all get scared.” Bro broadened his stance a little and grinned.

Dave groaned. “Bro, no.”

“You know where I keep the bigger Smuppets, right. Case you need something to hug.” Bro teased, and Dave rolled his eyes.

“I’d rather hug a goddamn kitchen knife, now _please_ just _go_.”

Bro didn’t stop talking as he pulled on his jacket and stepped into his shoes.

“There’s a bowl of candy by the door if any of the neighborhood kids come by. Don’t open to strangers though. Haven’t got enough sugar for that shit.” He said.

“Got it. Bye Bro.” Dave said impatiently. He walked Bro to the door as if it would make him leave faster. Right by the door, Bro turned around again, and Dave wondered what he’d done to deserve this.

“Oh, and try not to scream too loud. Don’t wanna scare the neighbors like you did last y-.”

“BYE BRO.” Dave repeated, pushing a snickering Bro out and closing the door behind him. Once it shut, Dave heard Bro’s voice through the door. Would this ever end?

“I’ll be back in the morning. Have a good time, kid.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Dave said, adding a murmured “thanks”.

Dave peeked through the blinds as Bro’s car left the street, and let out a relieved sigh. Finally.

He went around to the futon and plopped down, staring at the stack of movies. Just as he was trying to decide which they should watch first, the doorbell rang. Dave jumped up to answer it, and swung the door open to find Dirk on its step, holding a plastic bag.

“Aren’t you a little old to be trick or treating?” Dave said.

“You can’t tell me what to do.”

Both of them grinned as Dave stepped aside to let Dirk in.

Dirk knew the way around Dave’s house, and stopped by the kitchen first to put away the bottle of soda he’d brought. He then joined Dave on the futon, and added three more DVDs to the pile. Dave tilted his head to read the titles, and nodded in approval. He couldn’t understand a word, but they looked adequately creepy.

“Your Bro’s not here?” Dirk asked, looking around.

“You just missed him.” Dave said, grabbing a random bag of candy off the table and pulling it open. “Thought he was never gonna leave, Jesus.”

Dirk offered a sympathetic smile. He then noticed the bag Dave was holding, and raised an eyebrow.

“Dude. Are those Halloween M&M’s?”

*

They waited until it was dark outside. Dirk navigated through the DVD menu as Dave turned off the lights.

“Isn’t there an American version of The Ring?” Dave asked while Dirk enabled English subtitles.

“Yeah, but this one’s way better.” He turned up the volume a little, and hit play.

Both of them nestled back into the futon, a bag of M&M’s between them.

They started with their usual comedic criticism, joking away anything that might have scared them. About forty minutes into Ringu, Dave realized that yes, this version _was_ way better. Way scarier, too (though Dave was a bit less willing to admit that). The snarky comments and lame puns happened less and less as the movie progressed, and by the end, both boys were watching quietly. When the credits started to roll, Dirk was the first to break the silence.

“So what’d you think?” He asked, picking up the remote to stop the DVD.

“It was alright I guess.” Dave replied, making an effort to sound tough. Sure, the movie was creepy as fuck, but he’d seen The Ring before. This was no big deal. “What’s next?”

Dirk hummed as he grabbed a few boxes, scanning the synopses on the back.

“Alien, or Insidious. Your pick.” He said, holding out the movies to Dave.

“Let’s do Insidious first. Might fall asleep if we watch it later.” Dave said, and Dirk made an agreeing noise. He did his research, and according to a plethora of forum users, Insidious was pretty boring.

Just like before, they got through most of the movie without even flinching. The story picked up kind of slow, and there were plenty of silences for them to fill with jokes and banter.

However, while Dave knew how Ringu would end, he had no idea how Insidious ended. The plot progressed predictably, right up until the last ten minutes. When Dave heard a gasp, it took him a second to realize it came out of his own mouth. Dirk glanced over at him.

“You alright bro?” He asked. His voice was still a bit soft, even though the credits were on. Dave nodded quickly, and cleared his throat.

“Yeah man I’m cool. Cool as a fair number of cucumbers.” He briefly looked around the dark room, and then back at Dirk. “So Alien next right.”

Dirk nodded, and moved to switch the discs, but Dave put his hand on Dirk’s shoulder.

“I got it this time.” He said.

“You gotta press the-”

“I know how a DVD player works, asshole.” Dave interrupted, ejecting Insidious and storing it away.

Dirk shrugged, and got up to refill their cups. Looking into the kitchen from the futon, it appeared a lot darker than before. Dirk swallowed, briefly glanced back at Dave, and then casually flicked on the kitchen light. Dave’s head snapped around at the sudden change of lighting. He seemed a bit relieved when he saw it was just Dirk.

“Dude, why’d you turn the lights on?” He called.

“If you want me to pour soda all over your kitchen, feel free to turn them back off.” Dirk replied. His reasoning was solid enough for Dave to accept it, and when Dirk returned to the futon with refilled cups, Dave went back into the kitchen to turn the lights off. Without them, it was surprisingly dark in there, and he all but rushed back to the futon where Dirk had already started the movie.

“Do you want Doritos? I’m feelin’ Doritos.” Dave said, trying to dispel his uneasiness. Dirk reached for the bag of Nacho Cheese Doritos he’d brought, and tore it open.

Forty minutes into the movie, neither of them had eaten a single chip. They were glued to the screen, tense and dead quiet, Dave chewing on the inside of his cheek and Dirk fiddling with the cuffs of his shirt. The darkness of the room and the deep thrum of Bro’s surround system were pretty good at recreating a cinema experience, and at the next jump scare, Dave actually jerked back a little. Fortunately for him (and his pride), Dirk was too busy holding his breath to notice.

Then, the phone rang.

This time it was Dirk who jumped. He paused the movie once he remembered how to breathe, and looked at the phone as it buzzed away on the coffee table. He then looked at Dave, who was staring at the phone like he was waiting for it to stop. After a few rings, Dirk carefully spoke up.

“Shouldn’t you, y’know. Answer it?” He asked.

“Why don’t you answer it.” Dave countered, not taking his eyes off of the phone. Whoever was calling, they were pretty persistent.

“It’s not my phone.” Dirk said.

Dave didn’t say anything else. A few seconds later, the ringing finally stopped. Both Dirk and Dave stared at the phone for a bit longer, but it stayed quiet.

“Think we’re good?” Dirk asked, still eying the phone.

“Yeah.” Dave whispered.

Dirk un-paused the movie, and they continued watching.

If they weren’t on edge already, that phone call pushed them there at record speed. Dirk wouldn’t stop shifting around, and Dave kept picking at the side seam of his jeans. They only made each other more nervous with their restless behavior, and by the time the credits started rolling, there were two audible sighs of relief.

Now that he was no longer preoccupied with keeping his heart rate in check, Dave promptly remembered the Doritos, and he pulled the bag into his lap. Dirk tried reading some names off the screen as Dave munched away, reluctant to put in another movie. They both seemed pretty content like this, until the credits ended, and the movie’s main menu popped up. Dirk hesitantly turned to Dave.

“You wanna do another?”

Dave looked at the clock. Eleven thirty, which wasn’t anywhere near their usual bedtime, and pretty laughable for Halloween. Bro would undoubtedly ask how many movies they ended up watching, too. They’d have to do one more.

“Hell yes.” Dave said, forcing himself to sound excited. Dirk flashed a forced grin in return, and dragged himself up from the futon to switch out the DVD.

“What’s this one called?” Dave asked, watching Dirk click through several Korean menus.

“The Cat.” Dirk answered, returning to join Dave on the futon.

“Cool.” Dave said. He tried to relax- maybe the cultural gap would be big enough for this one not to be scary. Especially if it was a movie about cats. Cats weren’t scary.

So they settled back, watched as the movie started, and Dave realized he was right. Cats weren’t scary.

Cats were goddamn terrifying.

It would’ve been creepy enough with just the eerie staring and those unsettling meows, but they just _had_ to make them kill people, too. Dave was never going to be able to pet Jaspers again. Nor say hi to the cat he often saw roaming outside. He always thought that one looked suspicious…

The movie ended, and Dirk was very quick to hit stop. He settled back into the futon with what sounded like a drained sigh, like he’d just witnessed something life-changing. He kind of had.

“Well, that settles it.” Dirk said, and Dave looked up at him. “Cats are fucking evil. We should warn the Lalondes.”

Dave nodded. He was pretty sure Dirk meant it as a joke, but Dirk wasn’t laughing, and neither was he.

They sat like that for a while, until Dave figured he should turn off the TV. When he did, the entire room was instantly flooded in darkness, and Dave didn’t know how fast to turn that shit back on. Some random shopping channel popped up, reintroducing the room to a pale, blue light, and Dave could swear he heard Dirk breathe out in relief.

“Let’s turn on the lights.” Dirk suggested. “So we don’t trip on the way to your room.”

“Right.” Dave agreed. Good idea. Turning on the lights meant getting up and heading to the back of the room though, and Dave wasn’t exactly feeling that at the moment. He bit his lip.

“How about you go turn on the lights, and I’ll put the DVDs away.” Dave said. Dirk instantly shook his head.

“No man, I’ve got it.” He was already leaning over to grab the empty DVD box. Dave shifted. Well, shit. He looked back over his shoulder towards the light switch. It wasn’t that far away, but he could barely make out the buttons with the little light the TV offered, and the door to the hallway was open. He didn’t like this at all.

Dave exhaled. It was just a light switch. Man up, Strider. That chick in the movie could do it and so can you. He pulled himself from the couch, ignoring the slight tremble in his legs, and all but flash-stepped to the switch, hitting it way harder than he had to. His eyes stung as the lights blinked on, but man was this better. Way better. It was still dark down the hall, though. Dave looked over at Dirk.

“Should I just leave this here?” Dirk asked, motioning to the DVDs and some leftover snacks.

“Yeah, Bro won’t be home till tomorrow. We’ll clean up later.” Dave said, for no other reason than not wanting to spend more time in the living room. It just didn’t feel comfortable.

Dave waited until Dirk joined him before walking down the hall. Dirk looked around like he was expecting something to jump out at them, and Dave hit every light switch on the way to his room.

Once there, some of the tension melted away. They set up the spare mattress (that Dirk never slept on) and rummaged around a bit. Dave turned on his computer and played some music, while Dirk went through his emails. When they’d both gotten around to changing into nightwear (pajama bottoms and a shirt), Dirk realized that they had to go back to the bathroom to brush their teeth.

All the lights were still on, but the hallway felt unnaturally empty, and it was quiet out there. And chilly. Dirk glanced at Dave, who was fluffing up his pillow.

“You gonna brush your teeth?” Dirk asked, and Dave looked up like he’d just been reminded of something awful.

“Yeah.” He answered. “Let’s go.”

Dave conveniently waited for Dirk to leave the room first, and stayed close behind him as they made their way to the bathroom. Dirk refused to step up to the mirror until Dave had turned on the lights, and they stood side by side, quiet as they brushed their teeth with a bit more urgency than usual.

Dave left on the lights in the bathroom, and Dirk was going to say something about it, but he reconsidered. The more lights, the better, even if it wouldn’t matter once they made it back to Dave’s room.

However, in order to actually attempt sleep, they had to turn off the lights at some point. Dirk sat on the edge of Dave’s bed, and watched as Dave got up to the switch. With many small led lights of electronic odds and ends, it wasn’t too dark, and Dave had left his music playing. That helped too.

As soon as the room was dark, they heard a loud thud right outside the room. Dave clutched his chest with a whispered “jesus dick shitting christ”, and Dirk made a sound he’d never ever own up to later.

They looked at each other.

“Probably a car door slamming shut.” Dirk said.

“Yeah. Parents bringing home kids after wild Halloween parties and all that shit.” Dave added, nodding to himself.

“Yeah.” Dirk repeated, mimicking Dave’s nodding. That had to be it.

It was quiet for a bit.

“…You did lock the door, right?” Dirk asked carefully.

“What? Of course I did.” Dave answered, frowning. “I always do.”

Quiet again, and Dirk could see the doubt slipping into Dave’s eyes.

“…Right?” Dave asked.

“Dude, don’t ask me.” Dirk said, not nearly sounding as calm as he’d like.

Dave’s frown pulled into a pensive expression, and he rubbed at his neck.

“We should go check.” He then said. “Safety first, right.”

“Right.” Dirk agreed. “Wait, “we”?”

“Yeah bro.” Dave said. “It’ll be faster that way. Plus we can snag some of those M&M’s.” Dave was planning to take those along with them from the start, but he was so eager to retreat to the safety of his room that he completely forgot.

“Right.” Dirk sighed, dragging himself up from Dave’s bed. “OK.”

Just as Dave was about to open the door into the hallway, they heard another loud sound, like a door slamming shut.

Dirk froze mid-step. Dave’s hand shot towards Dirk’s shirt, clutching at it with his fist. They stood like that until Dirk dared to whisper.

“Maybe grab a sword. Or two.”

Dave nodded.

“Yeah.” He croaked out.

Luckily, they hadn’t left the room yet, and two weapons were easily fetched from Dave’s pile of shitty swords.

Armed and (sort of) ready, Dirk and Dave slowly stepped down the empty hall, each clutching the handle of their respective blades, and Dave still clinging to Dirk’s shirt. The door to the living room was shut, and that was weird, because Dirk was sure they’d left it open.

He was about to comment on it when the door swung open, revealing a large figure behind it. Dave yelped, and Dirk reflexively raised his weapon up in front of his chest.

“The fuck are you two doing?”

Bro stood at the other end of the hall, eyeing the boys with a single arched brow.

“Nothing what are you doing.” Dave said.

Bro looked them over, noting the swords, shaky knees and pale faces.

“I live here.” He said.

“I tried callin’ you to let you know I’d come home early, but you didn’t answer.” Bro continued, tilting his head. Dirk’s mouth fell into an “Oh”, but Dave didn’t budge.

“Didn’t hear.” He lied.

Dirk looked from Bro to Dave, and back again. Then he realized he still had his sword up. He quickly put it down, and cleared his throat.

Bro sighed, and shook his head.

“Y’all been watching scary shit, haven’t you.” He said.

“Maybe what’s it to you.” Dave answered. He’d lowered his sword as well, but he was still holding onto Dirk’s shirt.

“I keep telling you, that ain’t gonna end pretty.” Bro said, and Dirk could hear the “I told you so” in his voice.

“I’m fine.” Dave said quickly.

“Sure, that’s what you said last time. Remember when we watched Saw together? Man, you nearly pissed your-”

“Night Bro!” Dave interrupted, turning around and dragging Dirk with him back down the hall. Bro watched with an amused look in his eyes as Dirk stumbled, and the boys disappeared into Dave’s bedroom.

Dave slammed the door shut with a frustrated sigh, and turned around to find Dirk staring at him.

“Did you really-” Dirk started.

“Don’t.” Dave said. “Just don’t.”

Dirk fell quiet, and bit his lip to stifle a chuckle.

Their unexpected encounter with Bro had left both Dave and Dirk somewhat shaken, but they weren’t nearly as nervous as they were before. With Bro home, there’s no way anything creepy could get even remotely close to the house. Not that they were worried about anything like that. They weren’t 12 anymore, they could handle a few scary movies.

Dave conveniently forgot to turn off the lights though, and Dirk conveniently forgot to remind him. When they realized neither of them was going to get a wink of sleep after such an eventful evening, Dirk hauled one of his blankets over to Dave’s bed and nestled in beside him.

The two of them spent the night chatting quietly, taking turns playing Plants VS Zombies on Dirk’s phone until they finally fell asleep in the safety of each other’s arms.

Both of them decided that next year, they’d just marathon the Adam’s Family.

_fin_


End file.
